October Step Forward: ASK

“Don’t Make Assumptions. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.”

Don Miguel Ruiz


Welcome October!  It’s hard to believe that summer is long gone, and we are all preparing for longer nights, holidays by the truckload, pumpkin spice everything.  When I was thinking about this month’s word, it was really hard.  Not because there aren’t a million great words to write about or find quotes and photos to illustrate.  No.  it’s because there’s always so many great things to say, to learn, to challenge, to encourage.  But I kept thinking about the end of the month and the one night when it’s completely normal to knock on doors and beg for food….ok candy, but you get my point.  So that’s how we landed on ASK.  The word for October is small but mighty.  It brings all the parts of who we are, who we know, who we want to become into three little letters.


ASK is a courageous act.


Too often we live in surety (that is actually a mask for insecurity), assumption (you know the old adage, right?  When you ASSUME….).  To get beyond discomfort or to take a brave step forward into getting clarity where it’s muddled, hurtful or even confusing in relationships.


Instead of a calendar this month, I’m going to try a new idea.  I’ll be posting daily Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/encouragecounseling/) and Instagram (@encouragecounseling) inspirations.  I hope you’ll follow me, join me, friend me…however you want to join the daily dose!

I’ll also be posting QUESTIONS for a variety of reasons…just so you can practice being an expert ASKer.  I hope this twist on an old theme will prove to be fun and inspiring for you this month! Each posting should be a TREAT for you, your family, your relationships, your goals and your work or school.


Here’s a sample ASK list:

FRIENDSHIP ASK – Choose 2 – 3 of your closest friends, and ask them the following questions:

  1.  What is the most important thing I can do to be a good friend to you right now?
  2. In the recent past, is there anything that I could have done better or differently?  Is there anything I need to make changes in the way I friend you? (I told you that they have to be CLOSE friends!)
  3. What’s your favorite memory of our friendship?
  4. (If you haven’t asked…and trust me, you want to ask this before you need this…) If I need someone at 2 a.m., can I call you?  If I needed a ride to the airport, would you take me?

Take the attitude of a student, never be too big to ask questions, never know too much to learn something new.

Og Mandino

Need a safe place to ask hard questions?  Asking how you got to where you are and want to figure out new answers to old problems?  enCOURAGE Counseling is exactly the place that will support and inspire you to ask hard questions…new questions…and then courageously work on the answers that will change your life today.  Call for your FREE 15-minute phone consultation today (720-230-3076) OR email me on the Contact page.  Don’t let fear stop you from asking the questions YOU have about relationships, trauma, anxiety, depression or sexuality.

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